by Nellie Shani

Social workers who work with prisoners have given the shocking statistic that seven out of every ten people that end up in prison grew up in a home with no dad.

What is it that makes a child who grows up in a home where there was a father figure cope better with the stresses of life?

It is a proved fact that dads can and do make a difference in the lives of their children. Children who have a father that is actively involved in their lives seem to grow up more assured and self-confident than children who have not had the influence of a father. When a father is involved in the life of his children, he provides a much needed role model especially for his sons who will themselves one day be the heads of their household. A father is supposed to be a symbol of stability and security.

It is true that there are children who would have been much better off without the kind of influence that they got from their alcoholic, abusive and drug- pushing fathers. However, a hard working, responsible and faithful father goes a long way in producing children who are also hard working, responsible and faithful. We reproduce after our own kind.

Children who do well in school often have a father that is encouraging them and setting a good example. Fathers need to realize that they play a very important role in the lives of their children. They need to step up to the role of being the guide in their child's life.

What are some things that fathers can do to make a difference in the lives of their children? Here are a few suggestions:

• One, give your child permission to make mistakes. If she has to do things perfectly, she'll never take the risks necessary to discover and develop her gift.
• Two, ask questions. Help your child open up to the wonders of the world by asking intriguing questions: Why is the sky blue? Find the answers together.
• Three, have high expectations but make them realistic.
• Four, plan special family projects. Shared creativity can awaken and develop new talents.
• Finally, let your child know that you love them and communicate it in a way that they understand!

Nellie Shani is a Counselor, Conference speaker and writer. Her first book, "Stand Your Ground," and second book, "Hope For The Childless are available on amazon.com, Barnes and Nobles and on her author's websites. http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/StandYourGround.htm

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