That Green Eyed Monster: Jealousy

“For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice” James 3.16 E.S.V

Jealousy occurs when you feel there is a perceived threat of losing to someone else, the attention, love or other considerations from someone you value. It can occur between people in a romantic relationship, among siblings, among coworkers and so on. In a relationship where members have no mutual confidence and cooperation with one another, members are unable to work together for a common goal. Love and happiness disappear and a lot of ugly destructive passions abound. The outcome includes domestic violence, murder, and all kinds of plots. “Wrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?” Proverbs 27:4. The Bible says, the reason why we fight and quarrel is the desires that battle within us.  “You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel….” James 4: 2.

Instead of aggressively trying to hold on to others, to possessions, to more money and high status, the Bible says that we should ask God for what we really need; that which corresponds to his will for us. Other people and possessions cannot give us true love, joy and peace. So let us strive to be gentle and self controlled and not let our jealousy separate us from God.

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Jealousy is simply and clearly the fear that you do not have value.  Jealousy scans for evidence to prove the point - that others will be preferred and rewarded more than you.  There is only one alternative - self-value.  If you cannot love yourself, you will not believe that you are loved.  You will always think it's a mistake or luck.  Take your eyes off others and turn the scanner within.  Find the seeds of your jealousy, clear the old voices and experiences.  Put all the energy into building your personal and emotional security.  Then you will be the one others envy, and you can remember the pain and reach out to them.

~Jennifer James

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